September 22, 2008
Well, Ronnie Brown, that was really obnoxious.
Through the first two weeks of this NFL season, the Dolphins’ former stud RB had amassed a total of 17 carries for 48 yards, 5 catches for 47 yards, and 1 TD in playing second fiddle to everybody’s favorite “ex-stoner” Ricky Williams. This was a classic running back by committee situation, with neither one of these backs warranting any sort of serious fantasy attention. One is coming off a serious season-ending knee injury (Brown), the other off a mental and physical hiatus from professional football (Williams).
Chad Pennington is the starting QB, the offensive line is one of the league’s worst, and as a whole the team hadn’t won a regular season game since December 10, 2006. Move along, nothing to see here, you have better options at RB.
And, then… 4 rushing touchdowns. And 1 passing touchdown. From Ronnie Brown, the backup running back. On the road, against the mighty New England Patriots. On the day, Brown finished with 17 carries for 113 yards, 1 catch for 9 yards, and 19 yards passing to go along with those 5 TDs. In ETB’s fantasy scoring format, that amounts to 37.42 points. Wow.
Here’s the problem, Ronnie: all those touchdowns did no good for your owners because you were in all likelihood riding their bench. Cheers to those “wise” enough to start you, but they’re most definitely in the minority.
You flat out sea-hammocked them, Ronnie. Put a flaming bag of feces on their doorstep. Defecated all over their fantasy football confidence. Sea-hammocked them. That kind of garbage is for the birds, Ronnie. It’s for the birds. And so it’s with great displeasure that we name you, Ronnie Brown, ETB’s Sea Hammock of the Week for Week 3. Screw you dude.
Ronnie Brown Photo Credit: Icon SMI